This is why Daddy drinks at Christmas

[Klc]

Never touch wiring without this fine piece of kit....................remember the guy wiring just cared about 'grids' not 'rooms'.

+1... Gotten a 'poke' a few times wiring in my parents insane ancient house.

Highly sugguested is an inductive voltmeter - Doesn't even need to touch live metal, just come near it. Cheap pen type ones are a smart buy.

Course... only works if your smart enough to use it every time..  ;D

 

[Shamrock]

I'm doomed.

 

[Springroll]

why do women make this stuff so hard on us?? :crybaby:
I'm just a man!!!

Some of us enjoy watching our men go insane!! >
I got smart this year, bought what I wanted for Christmas and thanked him for it while he wrapped it.
No surprises, but I got exactly what I wanted, so no disappointment either!

I did surprise him though...with a new 25gallon aquarium for some of our cichlids. 28 of them crammed into a 30 gallon just wasn't working now that the babies are growing like weeds(2-3in average).

 

[Pea]

I've been told time and time again, by men I date, that women are just too complicated. Supposedly that is why I basically have to set his desktop background to a picture of what I want for X-mas, in order to get it through to him. But, I truly think the problem is that men are too simple. I throw hints like CRAZY, about anything and everything.  ;D

 

[Dissident]

I got "lucky".

After waiting for the last moment, and realizing that the mother in law got all the same suggestions I did(she, however, had not waited for tha last minute, leaving precious little for me to get the gf)

I had to scramble. I remembered something she mentionned last summer and came up with something on my own. I did good, thank God.

 

[niner domestic]

I guess you fellows missed the class on advice that you should make sure your partners have all the tools and who will put the kid's toys together themselves.  The little green guy and I have an agreement, he pays for said xmas toys... I put them together.  Simple.  No stress. 

 

[Shamrock]

 

[Haggis]

Not quite a Christmas story:

Many (like 18) years ago I bought my kids their first swing set.  It was a monster: three swings, a glider, a slide and a ladder,  Each time I finished a section, the little tykes rushed it and started to play.  The friggin' thing wasn't even anchored to the ground yet and they're swinging hard enough to launch themselves into low-earth orbit.   Instruction sheets, tools and parts were being scattered about by small, exuberant feet. A fter about four hours of this (with some neighbour kids thrown in to raise the lawsuit pucker factor) I went "old school' on the bunch of 'em at which they scattered.  I finished the assemby in about two more uninterrupted hours.

Several hours later, with the "structure" completed and firmly anchored, I noticed no kids were using it, even though about four or five were playing in the yard.  My wife headed out to tell them that when I'd said  "Get off the swings NOW!!!  GET OFF!!  You will NOT touch this thing anymore!  Just stay away!!"  that I didn't mean "forever".

 

[NL_engineer]

I've been told time and time again, by men I date, that women are just too complicated. Supposedly that is why I basically have to set his desktop background to a picture of what I want for X-mas, in order to get it through to him. But, I truly think the problem is that men are too simple. I throw hints like CRAZY, about anything and everything.  ;D

The problem is the said item keeps changing, leaving us to last minute shopping  ;D

 

[zipperhead_cop]

But what a small price to pay for the honour of being called, "Dad"! 

Absolutely!  However, starting tomorrow I am going to spend the year telling them that there is nothing more magical or precious than modelling clay. 

 

[GO!!!]

If you want something for Christmas, do what Mrs. GO!!! does;

Grab 9er (that's me) FMP, flip to the last page (the first unused one), and write "X-MAS GIFTS FOR ----"

On the second line (and the third and the fourth) write the name of the item, the cost, and where, both store name and lat/long said item can be purchased. Lack of detail will result in the cheaper option being purchased.

eg. If you want a 30GB pink iPod, write "iPod, pink, Future Shop, 299$, 137Ave and 97th street, north west corner of the Northgate mall, Edmonton AB Canada"

Strangely enough, Mrs. GO!!! was pleasantly surprised by many of the items on her list under the tree, because she placed her list in October.

Hints don't work. If you want it, say it, or do without. Communication is the key!

 

[Bruce Monkhouse]

I've been told time and time again, by men I date, that women are just too complicated. Supposedly that is why I basically have to set his desktop background to a picture of what I want for X-mas, in order to get it through to him. But, I truly think the problem is that men are too simple. I throw hints like CRAZY, about anything and everything.  ;D

I'm sorry,..did you say something????

 

[rmacqueen]

Ok, here's my situation.  My daughter has grown up and no longer lives at home so no more assembly projects to worry about right?  Nope, the evil child thinks it would be great fun to give me and her boyfriend this military figure that has to be completely assembled including the variety of weapons that it comes with.  The box says it includes instructions but when we open it up the "instructions" are nothing more than  a picture of the thing when assembled.

Sooooo, two hours later we finally get the thing together and guess what?  We have three pieces that we can't figure what they are for.  Another half hour of going on the website and changing pieces around before just giving up.

The moral is, don't start feeling complacent just because they have grown up because it comes back to bite you in the a**.  Now, if I can only figure out how this mp3 player works.

 

[zipperhead_cop]

Sooooo, two hours later we finally get the thing together and guess what?  We have three pieces that we can't figure what they are for.  Another half hour of going on the website and changing pieces around before just giving up.

Typically, "arms" attach at the shoulders, by the large end.  The other end with the five "fingers" can be used to simulate holding the stick thing, often called a "rifle". 
Bonne Chance  ;D

 

[rmacqueen]

Typically, "arms" attach at the shoulders, by the large end.  The other end with the five "fingers" can be used to simulate holding the stick thing, often called a "rifle". 

Arms?  Now I have to go back and do it again ;D

These are the full extent of the instructions http://www.stikfas.com/images/prod_greenm02.jpg

Edit for spelling

 

[IN HOC SIGNO]

So Mrs IHS has been enjoying her IPOD. The one I had to quiz her girlfriend about till I got the info on what she wanted. Here's a question for you female types out there. What happens when the girlfriend finally spills the beans that I didn't get the info cause I suddenly remembered a conversation with Mrs IHS where she expressly said "I want an IPOD?" I just can't believe that that ever happened anyway...but you never know.
I don't seem to remember it being this difficult in years gone by. Is it a menopause thing? my memory? or is she seriously messing with my mind? :

 

[navymich]

IHS --- all of the above  ;D

As for if her gf spills the beans, have an extra gift standing by waiting (maybe a fancy accessory for her new IPOD?), beg forgiveness and butter her up. 

 

[zipperhead_cop]

No way!  Never cave that easily.
Blame the friend.  Say "I asked her if she thought you would like an iPod, and she said she thought you would.  I was just confirming that you still wanted it".  Then spin it off like obviously there has been some misunderstanding.  Women don't expect us to be sneaky, so she will assume you are just being dumb and abandon the conversation. 
At least that works for me (sometimes  )

 

[IN HOC SIGNO]

IHS --- all of the above  ;D

As for if her gf spills the beans, have an extra gift standing by waiting (maybe a fancy accessory for her new IPOD?), beg forgiveness and butter her up. 

She's already talking a sub woofer speaker thingie for the IPOD....this is all a freaking plot isn't it? :crybaby:
I think Zip's got it...I've got to duck and weave...crap her birthday is Feb 9 I'd better start listening for those hints eh?? :-\

 

[NL_engineer]

She's already talking a sub woofer speaker thingies for the IPOD....this is all a freaking plot isn't it? :crybaby:
I think Zip's got it...I've got to duck and weave...crap her birthday is Feb 9 I'd better start listening for those hints eh?? :-\

You better start shopping now ;D  At least that way you can you can save a few bucks, wile the Boxing day sales are still on.