This is why Daddy drinks at Christmas
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aesop081
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Who can afford to shop there !!!!!
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Does Tiffany's sell vacuum cleaners? Kitchen utensils? Or washer/ dryer combos??
Wrapped in blue, of course.
Wrapped in blue, of course.
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Babs087 said:Thats ok, its probably better that i wax the floor. You did a shitty job the first time >
Well if you do something bad enough once, you wont get asked to do it a second time....... ;D
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I think we are seriously straying from the original intent of this thread...why daddy drinks at Christmas....while we did talk about the games that women play around this time of year to make us poor hapless men go crazy and thus turn to the bottle in increasing numbers...the originator also lamented the fact that children's toys take rocket scientists to put them together.
I got a digital camera which is great but also had a lot of instructions with it.
I just want to point the stupid thing and shoot...I don't want to take up time reading about how to do this that or the other thing......I think the digital camera folks need to put out an Instamatic Digital Camera...i.e. Sailor proof! (as in "This sailor proof") ;D
I got a digital camera which is great but also had a lot of instructions with it.
I just want to point the stupid thing and shoot...I don't want to take up time reading about how to do this that or the other thing......I think the digital camera folks need to put out an Instamatic Digital Camera...i.e. Sailor proof! (as in "This sailor proof") ;D
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I got my mother a digital camera for XMas. She's good for sitting there for hours and reading the instructions, but then still has tons of questions. So I bought her one exactly like I have, so at least if she has a problem (long distance of course), it will be easier for me to talk her through it.
IHS: have you learned how to hook your camera up to this fancy thing called a computer and share your pictures with us?
IHS: have you learned how to hook your camera up to this fancy thing called a computer and share your pictures with us?
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IHS, see one way to solve the problem of putting kid's toys together is to live across the street from an actual rocket scientist. Never had a set of Ikea instructions or toy instruction.. (although the Thomas the Tank Engine electric track was a bit of a challenge even for mr rocket scientist so a mere mortal would have been screwed) that he couldn't figure out.
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Either that niner, or have the woman of the house (aka "head of household") put it together. It's amazing what can get done when DIRECTIONS are read AND followed. Of course, this just brings us around full circle, because if we are doing this job that SHOULD rightfully be done by the man, then we do require (and expect) compensation.
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True Mich, I suppose when we get posted out of here to that lovely place and I'm short a rocket scientist, I'll have to start putting things together again. But until then, I call my 1800youneedasmartperson across the street.
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airmich said:I got my mother a digital camera for XMas. She's good for sitting there for hours and reading the instructions, but then still has tons of questions. So I bought her one exactly like I have, so at least if she has a problem (long distance of course), it will be easier for me to talk her through it.
IHS: have you learned how to hook your camera up to this fancy thing called a computer and share your pictures with us?
Yes I have that's not all that difficult to do. But how do I share pics other than putting one at a time on the posts. I tryed to get into galleries but wasn't able to figure it out...I'll have another go this afternoon. ???
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Personnally I prefer using www.photobucket.com and then posting the link. When you post the link between [ img] [/img] your pic will also be posted. This option is in photobucket to be able to copy and paste. Very user friendly. Good luck! 
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airmich said:Personnally I prefer using www.photobucket.com and then posting the link. When you post the link between [ img] [/img] your pic will also be posted. This option is in photobucket to be able to copy and paste. Very user friendly. Good luck!
thanks mich i'll take a look ;D
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I know - I'm entering the thread REAL late for some of this... I'm responding to various posts ranging from Page 1 to Page 12... so I hope it makes sense.
I did really well on the original gold and diamond masterpiece almost a year ago and have been excused from any further diamond expenditures until this one is paid off - so the cost of borrowing is ridiculous, but the payments are tiny and I don't have to buy any more compressed carbon for about 5 years!
As a matter of fact - she asked for CUBIC ZIRCONIA ear studs this Christmas and that's what she got! And everyone thinks I spent a mint - except her and I!!
Now - if there isn't a Tiffany & Co in your neighbourhood, you can also go with a pink bag as opposed to a blue box - however, most of the items she desires from Holt Renfrew cost more than the ones she wants from T&C... so what to do... oh, I know - she is a Nurse with the Feds, and makes more than me - so all I have to do is GO WITH HER! I smile, hold her bags, compliment how she looks in everything, and buy the coffee and lunch. She buys her own damn HR merchandise.
Then, we go to a place I can afford - we walk up and down stores and aisles within those stores - she says "I like items a, b, c" - and I say - "what sizes/colours would keep you from having to fight crowds on boxing day?" She tells me, because she hates crowds.
I buy everything in my price range - and pick up the rest and sell back to my family to give to her. I also pick up a matching necklace and CUBIC ZIRCONIA pendant for those studs. Now, not only does she get EVERYTHING she wanted - I also win "JTF Ninja Sniper Commando of Shopping Bonus Points" because she got a present she didn't know about, that matches one she DID!!
Y'all can take the "lessons" from the ladies above - or you can sit the lady of your life down, and say: "Listen... how many times have you 'dropped hints' that I didn't get? Now, do you want to go shopping with me and help, or would you like a blender that doesn't match either the coffee maker or the toaster oven?"
And to the ladies:
Saying, "I like so-and-so's blouse" is complimenting your friend.
Saying, "I sure would like a red blouse" is a hint.
Saying "Buy me a red blouse" is an order.
We respond to hints and orders. You complimenting other women gets us on other tangents COMPLETELY.
FINALLY, the Miranda Rights for Men:
http://webpages.charter.net/denny3249/miranda.htm
In order to give credit where it's due - I first read the Miranda for Men in an Asa Baber editorial in Playboy when I was too young to be legally in possession of such publications. Mr Hefner and Mr Baber - all credit to you... Mr Hefner for founding such a glorious empire, and Mr Baber for actually writing editorials that I can quote to prove that there are actually articles in Playboy.
tlm.
PS:
One more thing ladies:
Ummm... if we're such losers at picking up your non-existent hints... why can't you ever manage to remember our favourite brand of beer? Everytime I go to the beer store - I bring home the same kind - religiously. If they are out, I actually use my cell phone and call around to find a beer store with some in stock. Everytime you go, I get some inferior swill with a free t-shirt that you won't even let me wear in public because it looks cheap. What is up with that?
I did really well on the original gold and diamond masterpiece almost a year ago and have been excused from any further diamond expenditures until this one is paid off - so the cost of borrowing is ridiculous, but the payments are tiny and I don't have to buy any more compressed carbon for about 5 years!
As a matter of fact - she asked for CUBIC ZIRCONIA ear studs this Christmas and that's what she got! And everyone thinks I spent a mint - except her and I!!
Now - if there isn't a Tiffany & Co in your neighbourhood, you can also go with a pink bag as opposed to a blue box - however, most of the items she desires from Holt Renfrew cost more than the ones she wants from T&C... so what to do... oh, I know - she is a Nurse with the Feds, and makes more than me - so all I have to do is GO WITH HER! I smile, hold her bags, compliment how she looks in everything, and buy the coffee and lunch. She buys her own damn HR merchandise.
Then, we go to a place I can afford - we walk up and down stores and aisles within those stores - she says "I like items a, b, c" - and I say - "what sizes/colours would keep you from having to fight crowds on boxing day?" She tells me, because she hates crowds.
I buy everything in my price range - and pick up the rest and sell back to my family to give to her. I also pick up a matching necklace and CUBIC ZIRCONIA pendant for those studs. Now, not only does she get EVERYTHING she wanted - I also win "JTF Ninja Sniper Commando of Shopping Bonus Points" because she got a present she didn't know about, that matches one she DID!!
Y'all can take the "lessons" from the ladies above - or you can sit the lady of your life down, and say: "Listen... how many times have you 'dropped hints' that I didn't get? Now, do you want to go shopping with me and help, or would you like a blender that doesn't match either the coffee maker or the toaster oven?"
And to the ladies:
Saying, "I like so-and-so's blouse" is complimenting your friend.
Saying, "I sure would like a red blouse" is a hint.
Saying "Buy me a red blouse" is an order.
We respond to hints and orders. You complimenting other women gets us on other tangents COMPLETELY.
FINALLY, the Miranda Rights for Men:
http://webpages.charter.net/denny3249/miranda.htm
In order to give credit where it's due - I first read the Miranda for Men in an Asa Baber editorial in Playboy when I was too young to be legally in possession of such publications. Mr Hefner and Mr Baber - all credit to you... Mr Hefner for founding such a glorious empire, and Mr Baber for actually writing editorials that I can quote to prove that there are actually articles in Playboy.
tlm.
PS:
One more thing ladies:
Ummm... if we're such losers at picking up your non-existent hints... why can't you ever manage to remember our favourite brand of beer? Everytime I go to the beer store - I bring home the same kind - religiously. If they are out, I actually use my cell phone and call around to find a beer store with some in stock. Everytime you go, I get some inferior swill with a free t-shirt that you won't even let me wear in public because it looks cheap. What is up with that?
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yammit said:
Now do you understand why I really dislike christmas?
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