The WTF News Files

[jollyjacktar]

Kharma is a biatch...

http://www.msn.com/en-ca/news/world/burglary-suspect-hiding-in-pond-killed-by-11-foot-alligator-authorities-say/ar-AAg90Hh?li=AAadgLE&ocid=HPCDHP

It made me smile when I read that elsewhere today.  Darwin Award winner!!!

 

[The Bread Guy]

WTF, indeed ....

A retired Canadian Forces member who worked as a therapist offering alternative health treatments including his own "orgasm technique" has been found guilty of sexually molesting five of his patients.

Michael Norris, 63, of Golden Lake was an unlicensed therapist who offered a "cranio-sacral" therapy that was supposed to help his female victims with head and neck pain, but instead asked the women to take off their clothes before touching them sexually, a judge found Monday.

Four of the assaults occurred in Norris's Golden Lake home while the fifth was committed in the home of one of the women.

The assaults occurred over a five-year period beginning in 2008.

( .... )

Norris was injured in Bosnia and received "cranio alternative therapy" and it worked, so began studying it himself, court heard. He also studied lymph drainage therapy and visceral manipulation therapy. Lymph drainage therapy can involve placing hands near the breasts while visceral manipulation techniques can involve touching near the genitals, court heard.

The trial heard that Norris had also developed his own "neurotransmitter therapy" or "orgasm technique" that involved stroking his fingers. Norris claimed it could result in orgasms ....

 

[medicineman]

Sounds like I'm in the wrong line of work...

MM

 

[jollyjacktar]

Leonardo DiCaprio scared by a Chinook.  :rofl:

http://www.calgarysun.com/2015/12/09/its-a-chinook-leo-albertans-respond-to-dicaprios-climate-experience-while-filming-the-revenant

 

[CougarKing]

Bribery with sex? :

Shanghaiist

Chinese mum offers to sleep with US customs official if he just turns a blind eye to $160,000 in undeclared luxury goods

A Chinese woman has been accused of offering sex as a bribe to a U.S. customs official at JFK airport, after she was caught red handed with a considerable amount of undeclared luxury goods.

Hong Yang, 55, first arrived at New York's John F. Kennedy International Airport from Paris last July with her sister and adult daughter. The Customs and Border Patrol officers found undeclared items in their luggage, including designer bags, a fur coat, diamond jewellery and watches valued at $160,000, according to New York Daily News.

The complaint filed at Brooklyn Federal Court said that the woman attempted to then bribe the officer with a note with her name and phone number on it, and offered to throw in a watch and US$10,000 if he would turn a blind eye to the goods.

(...SNIPPED)

 

[medicineman]

Was she hot though?

MM

 

[dimsum]

Was she hot though?

MM

She's 55.  According to the Avg Asian Aging Process....

 

[medicineman]

Point taken, lol.

MM

 

[George Wallace]

Now these Congressional Hearing interviews are very scary:

https://www.facebook.com/RepDeSantis/videos/1001434629914597/?theater

https://www.facebook.com/Oversight/videos/10153418211287517/?theater

https://www.facebook.com/video.php?v=1641926262691391&theater

 

[BorisK]

This seemed fitting for the WTF News Files thread :

http://globalnews.ca/news/2404049/toronto-councillor-suggests-calling-in-army-to-deal-with-violent-turf-war/

 

[mariomike]

http://globalnews.ca/news/2404049/toronto-councillor-suggests-calling-in-army-to-deal-with-violent-turf-war/

Trending: Is Giorgio Mammoliti the Donald Trump of Toronto?
Dec 16, 2015
http://www.citynews.ca/2015/12/16/trending-is-giorgio-mammoliti-the-donald-trump-of-toronto/

 

[CougarKing]

:facepalm:

Huffington Post

Masturbating Men Will Find Their Hands Pregnant In The Afterlife, Muslim Televangelist Warns
The Huffington Post UK  |  By Ryan Barrell

televangelist has warned male Muslims away from masturbation - because it may leave their hands pregnant in the afterlife.

Mücahid Cihad Han supposedly made the claim in response to a call from a man who "kept masturbating, although he was married, and even during the Umrah", a pilgrimage similar to the Hajj.

Hearing the man's plight, Han stated that masturbation is forbidden in Islam and went on to say: "Moreover, one hadith states that those who have sexual intercourse with their hands will find their hands pregnant in the afterlife, complaining against them to God over its rights".

(...SNIPPED)

 

[GAP]

he never said what the hands give birth to.......fingers, extra hands to help the workload, penis's, 

 

[jollyjacktar]

:facepalm:

Huffington Post

Heard that one before from the nut jobs.  However did they become at one time the leading edge of science and wisdom with leadership like that?

 

[dimsum]

Heard that one before from the nut jobs.  However did they become at one time the leading edge of science and wisdom with leadership like that?

Well, when the western Europeans were more concerned with balancing the four humours and blood-letting....

 

[jollyjacktar]

Well  if the nutjob is right and my hands take me for child support, then I'll never be out of debt in the next life or the one after that either...

 

[OldSolduer]

Heard that one before from the nut jobs.  However did they become at one time the leading edge of science and wisdom with leadership like that?

Ghengis Khan - Thats how!

 

[dimsum]

Well  if the nutjob is right and my hands take me for child support, then I'll never be out of debt in the next life or the one after that either...

Wouldn't that be a.....

...handout?

 

[jollyjacktar]

Wouldn't that be a.....

...handout?

We're having too much fun here, hehehehe

 

[mariomike]

"You get on the plane and sit next to someone with this as their emotional support animal, what do you do?"
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/12096210/Passenger-takes-turkey-on-flight-as-emotional-support-animal.html